After threatening to quit Fitness First due to my lack of attendance (aka – the leaking hole from my budget), the gym offered me three free personal training sessions which I accepted. Consequently I have started back at least once a week back to the treadmills and pool. My gripe is the naked ladies in the change room. Why? I mean it, why do you have to parade naked around the locker room while getting changed? Honestly I am not too much of a modest prude but I don’t want to see breasts, boobs, bosoms and bottoms when I go to collect my bags. The Goldcoast is the place where breast enhancements are advertised on the radio with complimentary financial plans to pay for them. I have nothing against enhancements for sure I am seriously considering one in a few years time for a little lift. But as a major generalisation the women I see parading in the gym are blonde, tanned with and massive fake breasts. Which brings me to the story of the naked lady in the gym the other week.

I entered the changing room, alone and walked to my regular locker space. I don’t know why I chose this one as there are hundreds to pick. It was not busy. To my right there is one of those standing solarium’s. The one where you stand up and close the circular doors while all the rays tan you for a specified time. But this day there was a lady, full frontal naked, perky boobs, and a high pitched accent from somewhere European (although my pick in accents is terrible to rely on), with the door wide open and just chatting on the phone. I groaned to myself and gave N a quick text of another naked lady at the gym (I think he enjoys the stories) and off I went to the treadmill for fifteen minutes of pure boredom. After my little cardio I decided it was time for a swim so I walked back to the change room to collect my togs and towel. As I entered the change room, the naked lady accosted me at my locker, half yelling and screaming to get someone from reception. Grabbing my shoulder and waving about as I diverted my face to anywhere but jumping boobs, “I have been burnt, get the reception, I am going to sue Fitness First, Look at me. Arrrghghg”

Argh! Thankfully I was saved by the staff who ushered her to get dressed. She left to go the doctor to get a statement on the incident while the staff removed the tanning solution from the counters and added another sign to the solarium highlighting the dangers of self tanning.

I think I have had enough of naked ladies at the gym for a little while.

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